Katahane Style Guide

For the sake of consistency, listing out things that need to be listed, discussed, and solved. If not, just leave as reminder.

General

To blank a line (with most recent version tools,) put a single hyphen like so: <$0900> このわたくしに課せられた使命』」=-

If you use single quotes anywhere, make them ‘fancy quotes.’ Whatever's easiest for you works for double or Japanese quotes, the lines copier will change them to “fancy double quotes” automatically.

Ellipses should be normal periods (...) and trimmed to 3 in length.

Transcribe sound effects like 'Mukii' as is, unless you can think of a satisfying equivalent in common use in English.

I'm changing these to "argh!", "grrr!", "eek!", and similar as I find them, since I think they stick out like sore thumbs in the localized script. You can change them back if you feel really passionate about them, though. --the_paper 20:06, 7 November 2010 (CST)

They'd be acceptable candidates for an ALT= thingy to localize them in the 'natural' version patch only, but I'll also be leaving that to whoever feels passionate about them to go through and add those in. -I failed jp302 07:11, 8 November 2010 (CST)

Change all ―― to a single em dash ―.

Use any dash, the important part is to have one of them instead of two, and not use - hyphens for the dashes at end/beginning of line -I failed jp302 15:38, 5 September 2010 (CDT)

Shirohane Characters

Cero

Generally speaks politely.

• レインさん = Rein
• シルヴィアさん = Miss Sylvia sr039
• トニーノさん = Mr.Tonino sr039
• sometimes calls Angelina as Ange(アンジェ) sr045

Wakaba

Speaks normally (in-between Light and Cero), though much more politely to Rein.

• レインさん = Mr.Rein
• おじいさん/おじーさん = Grandfather <$7FC3> sr009

Light

Speaks the most casually.

• ねーちゃん = Sis
• セロにーちゃん = Uncle Cero (Is Brother Cero a bit better? Uncle is more like oji-san in Japanese. Also Cero is not that much older than Light, it is a more brotherly relationship -- Aaeru 27/08/2010)

As I said on IRC, I frankly can't see anyone calling someone Brother to their face in English unless they are a monk, but if I get voted down I'm willing to make the change. Apparently 'uncle' to refer to any family friend is more of a Southern thing. -I failed jp302 14:59, 27 August 2010. In which case, just Cero then because Light already refers to him as Cero inside his thought bubbles (also on IRC) and the nii-chan part is kind of casual to begin with. -Aaeru 28 August 2010. (CDT)

Yeah, calling anyone Brother is strange unless they're a monk or a cultist. Uncle is...a bit stiff as well. Perhaps Light could call him Bro (when nii-chan is used, internal monologues would have "Cero" as always)?

I don't know, 'Bro' seems awkward as well though I can't put a finger on why... In any case, I agree that there's no need to try and translate the niichan outside of dialogue. If someone did that it was probably an accident. -I failed jp302 16:29, 28 August 2010 (CDT)

I actually thinks Uncle fits for a little kid calling someone around 18+ years old? It's not the best equivalent for nii-chan but I do think it's suitable if you disregard the literal Japanese honorific meaning and relate it solely to their actual relationship in the game and the purpose of the honorific. Which is quite a near-friend yet admiring/respecting view from Light. Mr. would be too distant for them, Bro would sound like some backstreet hiphops???, while Brother is said above, canceling the honorific all together misses the point of the near yet admiring properties. I too frowned at the Uncle when it was first implemented, but well, yeah, i kinda grew used to it and can't think of any other suitable equivalence. --Yeah321 16:58, 28 August 2010 (CDT)

I somehow agree very reluctantly --Aaeru

I'm guessing 'Cero-niichan' is out then? If you want a fully localised version that is, however if you didn't, then you could just include a small Readme file on release explaining any honourifics used. Oh and before someone asks, I use Australian English so if anything looks slightly wrong, it probably isn't wrong for me =P. -Solarnis 06:54, 5 September 2010 (CDT)

We're currently using "Uncle Cero" in the Natural version patch and "Cero-nii-chan" in the Literal version patch. -I failed jp302 03:36, 10 September 2010 (CDT)

Just a sidenote. I stumbled upon this in a textbook. Nii-chan is, quote: "お兄さん doesn't mean 'older brother'; it's sort of affectionate, casual way of referring to, or calling out to, a young man, usually around college/university age."I expect adding ちゃん instead of さん makes it even more casual and intimate. Also, how do I insert time codes? like 28 August etc.Aaeru

Yes, that's why I found Uncle to be equivalent. For timestamps use four tildes instead of three. -I failed jp302 03:36, 10 September 2010 (CDT)

Timestamps for the blog are inserted by using four ~ (Tildas) in a row, it will also link your name (I don't know how to link my name any other way lol). You can find the tilda key to the left of the number one key on your keyboard and you'll need to hold down shift to print it. Solarnis 05:01, 13 September 2010 (CDT)

• じーさん = Grandpa

Coco

Shouldn't often speak unnecessary grammar words, or words longer than two syllables. Put a comma or dash after most syllables to illustrate her speaking style.

And please please try to cutefy her thought bubbles and speech as creative as you can.

• ネムネムさん = Sleepy-py
• やぱぱり = Realily
• やたた = Yayay
• ぷんぷん = Mad mad

• ジージ/おじいさん = Gramps/Grandpa <$02AA> of sr011

Belle

Speaks the most politely.

• アンジェリナさん = Miss Angelina
• シルヴィアさん = Miss Sylvia sr040
• シュエスタ = Schwester (as opposed to 'the Schwester') when referring to her character in the play. sr053 only?

Angelina

• ヘルマーさん = Mr.Helmer (Starts at <$2CDC> at sr024)
• おねえさま = Lady Marion (<$D085> sr016)

Nicola

• 天使さん = Miss Angel (Belle)

Marion

Speaks like an elegant mischievous ojou-sama

• "my dear" speech habit when talking to Angelina <$8C4A> sr017

Lulu

Try to avoid mentioning his/her gender, though this might not be possible in English.

Kurohane Characters

Coco

• Does not stutter as she used to in Shirohane, able to speak sentences smoothly
• Refers to Christina as ヒメサマ = Princess
• ダイジーン = Minister

Christina Dorn

• Being referred to everyone except Dua and Coco(ヒメサマ hime-sama in katakana) who said 姫様 as "Your/Her Highness"
• OPTIONAL: but can be referred to princess as a third party relying on context. Example : My beloved Princess, The Princess of this country, thought bubbles etc, prioritize smooth reading.

Dua

Closer relationship with Christina

• Refers to Christina as　(姫)　= Princess

Ein Ronberg

His name is spelled as such in an in-game CG (that looked difficult to edit), so we've decided to use that spelling instead of Ein Romberg as on the the official website.

• Refers to Princess Christina (姫君) = Milady (in direct conversation) the Lady (in third person reference)

Jussi Osborne

As per Ein. Osuborne seems like a simple typo.

• When referred to by Hans or anyone (Jussi-殿) = Lord Jussi

Fritz Ronberg

フリッツ・ロンベルク Ein Ronberg's father.

Terms

青の都/白の都/赤の都/Xの都

___ Capital

青の国/白の国/赤の国/Xの国

___ Kingdom

In cases where the ヴァイス/ブリュー/カーディナル furigana is used (Kurohane only?) I've started using Weiss/Blew/Cardinal where I judge they sound better. You can too. -I failed jp302

• 人形技術 = Doll Arts
• 技術(when referring to Doll Arts) = Art
• 技師 = Engineer
• 人形技師 = Doll Engineer
• 『秘伝』 (in term of doll arts) = Secret Recipe
• 調律 = tuning

• 使節団 = Representative

• 謁見の間 = Court this room

Undecided

Angelina -> Self あたし(Atashi) (Might affect ALOT if changed) Normally I could just "I" this even though it's あたし, but because of this pun

あたし(Atashi) from <$6E9A> to <$75A3> [1]
ニコラ「Well no matter how I think of it, her highness wouldn't call herself as "Atashi", right?」
...
ニコラ「No, I just thought that it might be my fault for your habit of calling yourself "Atashi".」
アンジ「Really?」
ニコラ「...Don't you remember?」
I twisted my head and tried to recall, but I've always refer myself as "Atashi".
ニコラ「Oh my, that was when Anne is still young. At that time, I was at the age of calling myself as "Atashi"」
ニコラ「After that, you too imitated me and started referring to yourself as "Atashi".」
ニコラ「Having no choice, I had to make sure I referred to myself as "Watashi" while telling you over and over again to call yourself as "Watashi"... That happened, right?」
アンジ「I do have a bit of image... So that's how I started calling myself as "Atashi".」
ニコラ「In the end, I couldn't change your habit of calling yourself as "Atashi".」

This conversation pretty much has to be rewritten with a different meaning, if we want to have no Japanese or TL notes. Ideas:

Angelina, like, talks like a, like, valley girl (no). Or some other speech habit if there's one that's not too obnoxious - I was considering British/Irish affectations (use of "I amn't" and such), even though it's random.

Nicola tells her the princess should use the royal we

Make the conversation about stuttering, since Angelina has choked on her lines a few times

Quite thorny, so anyone reading this page is invited to offer suggestions, not just project staff. -I failed jp302

Nng. I would say that just making a translator's note would be fine, anyone playing a visual novel is likely familiar with how there are several ways of saying "I" in Japanese. If you find it that bothersome, then we could just change that one word (like saying Ah for I: "Ah do vaguely remember something like that...), but doing more than that would probably be changing her character too much?

I personally think tl note is abit...iunno. I thought at least we could do is maintain the nuance, the meaning of this whole conversation is like Nicola saying Angelina is childishly girly. If this is the point, maybe we can use the sentence before where Angelina said "When I'm on stage, I'm the princess." at <$6F3B> and Nicola started laughing at it refering that she was childishly girly and was a habit of herself at young age too. Very thorny since but might as well. --Yeah321 01:44, 11 August 2010 (CDT)

ニコラ「...Still, how should I say it. I heard you're going to perform as a princess, are you sure you can do it?」
アンジ「What do you mean by that?」
ニコラ「Well no matter how I think of it, her highness wouldn't be talking so inelegantly, right?」
アンジ「It's fine, since I would surely perform according to the script. When I'm on stage, I'm the princess.」
ニコラ「Fufufu.」
アンジ「What's so funny?」
ニコラ「No, I just thought that it might be my fault for you being so childishly obsessed with being the princess.」
アンジ「Really?」
ニコラ「...Don't you remember?」
I twisted my head and tried to recall, but I found no memory of relevance.
ニコラ「Oh my, that was when Anne is still young. At that time, I was still a young girl and dreamed to be a princess too.」
ニコラ「After that, you too grew to like that too because of my influence .」
ニコラ「Having no choice, I had to straighten up myself from being behaving too childishly and constantly monitor you to grow up maturely.」
アンジ「I do have a bit of image... So that's how I started to like being a princess.」
ニコラ「In the end, I couldn't change your childish girly way of thinking.」
アンジ「...Ufufu. My apologies for that.」
ニコラ「Hahahaha! It's okay, take this habit along with your farewell gift!」

just putting up an idea, just saying, bolded parts are rewrite parts--Yeah321 14:03, 23 August 2010 (CDT)

I guess that is more sensible. I really wanted to convey that Angelina's speech is different in some way but it's probably better to 'enhance' the script as little as possible. Thanks for the rewrite, needed to see it to be convinced it was the right way to handle this. -I failed jp302 20:48, 23 August 2010 (CDT)

There's still lots of little things we can do to show how her speech pattern is a little immature, like using informal contractions (ie "gonna" instead of "going to") if ya want. Though that doesn't really cover the girly aspect...bleh.

---

About namings and such: Why not have it both ways?

It was ten minutes work to come up with a Python utility that can take all instances like this in a script:

   <$4D67> ライト「セロにーちゃんに？=ライト「With Uncle Cero? Why? I'm coming too!」
   // ALT=ライト「With Cero-nii-chan? Why? I'm coming too!」

and swap them:

   <$4D67> ライト「セロにーちゃんに？=ライト「With Cero-nii-chan? Why? I'm coming too!」
   // ALT=ライト「With Uncle Cero? Why? I'm coming too!」

This is a little more work for editors/QC (to add the ALT lines and check them for correctness) but would make it very easy for us, once that's done, to release two versions of the patch with and without honorifics - maybe call them a 'Literal' one and a 'Natural' one. In the literal one, we could also leave stuff like the 'atashi' discussion above untampered with, to satisfy the purists.

What do you think? -I failed jp302 00:15, 30 August 2010 (CDT)

I don't really get the first half of what you wrote, but seems like maybe you want a dual release(LIT+ENG). I don't really have anything against it, since I never really seen any tl did anything like that before so I wouldn't really know what would happen... but it does sound out of the ordinary to me. Honestly if I were to pick a side yes or no, I guess the side where you guys don't have to do too much work. If it's just about the Uncle/nii-chan, i'm sure we can fix that quickly in one show by some ctrl+F, and we're still a long way too, so..@@? --Yeah321 15:34, 30 August 2010 (CDT)

---

All Ages patch. I know this is hardly a time to be talking about another patch but, I just want to ask if this was possible. In my opinion, Katahane lends itself to an all ages patch because of its fairy-tale like qualities. Kira Kira the All Ages version from mangagamer brought in a lot of new readers http://www.japanator.com/my-first-eroge-kira-9734-kira-14558.phtml NNL put into their version of Ef - Tale of the two, an option to skip sex scenes. Now I have not played the sex scenes in Katahane myself so I don't know how important they are to the storyline. But I think there is a reasonable number of people who might feel put off by the sex and miss out on reading the story. - Aaeru

I actually don't mind, and would like it if it's possible, STILL~ things isn't that easy. You know, we need to finish up the script, and let editing get done first, then see if it's do-able with the current script without altering too much changes to the main story. --Yeah321 14:49, 5 September 2010 (CDT)

Agreed. I don't see any technical reason why it wouldn't be possible, but it might take more rewriting then we're comfortable with. We'll finish the game first in any case. -I failed jp302 15:38, 5 September 2010 (CDT)